In conversation with some theologically gifted friends recently, it was mentioned that many contemporary Christians seem to make Christianity all about them. That gave me the idea to rewrite the Lord’s Prayer based on many conversations I have had or that I have overheard. Without further adieu, I give you the Lord’s Prayer for Today’s Christians.
Our deity who art everywhere and in everything,hallowed be every possible name for you.Please make things here a little better,and give us all the things we wantwhich is exactly what heaven will be like.Deprive us not of our daily mochaccinos,and don’t make us feel guilty for the bad things we do,but definitely punish everyone we dislike.Deliver us unto many pleasing things,for nothing that we wantcould possibly be evil.For the world is ours,our self-actualization knows no bounds,and we are pretty freaking awesome.Amen.